Tips to keep the seat next to you free
Melbourne, December 3 (ANI)
Travelling in a public transport can be a beautiful experience of your life or a nightmare depending on the person seating next to you.
Travel website Gadling has suggested some tips to keep the seat next to you free, according to News.com.au.
First thing you can do is to spread your stuff out. This one doesn't work for long but it will mean you are the last seat to be picked. No-one likes the hassle of asking you to move everything.
Or make the seat seem smaller. Spread your legs out wide (obviously this one is easier for blokes), put the armrest up. Make that seat look as unappealing as possible.
If this does not work try to look crazy. Practice in a mirror. Roll your eyes, drool. No one wants to sit next to the crazy person.
Another way is to be a god basher. Bring a bible. Sit it in your lap. When someone asks if the seat next to you is free ask them if they've accepted the Lord as their Saviour.
Or get funky. Drop a few farts, go for a run in the morning and don't wear deodorant. Carry a bag with really stinky cheese.
Carry a spew bag, a box of incontinence pads or an adult nappy.
Play bad music loudly through oversized earphones. Gadling recommends "I touch myself" by the Divinyl's for men and Richard Marx's "I will be right here waiting for you" for women.
If all the above fail to work then court a seat mate who is attractive. Pick out someone you like and ask them to sit down. You never know, it could lead to something.