Perform or perish is Manmohan Singh's mantra (Capital Buzz)

New Delhi, Nov 29 : There's a deadline coming up and many ministers are suddenly burning the midnight oil. Prime Minister Manmohan Singh wants his entire cabinet to submit performance reports of the functioning of each ministry by Nov 30.

While several high performers like Home Minister P. Chidambaram, Finance Minister Pranab Mukherjee and Environment Minister Jairam Ramesh are confident that their ministries have made the mark, several others have reasons to worry.

Until a week ago, New and Renewable Energy Minister Farooq Abdullah was unaware of Cabinet Secretary K.M. Chandrashekar's missive seeking a report detailing the work done by his ministry. Others like Heavy Industries Minister Vilasrao Deshmukh are believed to be working overtime to ensure that targets are met.

Then there are Railway Minister Mamata Banerjee and Chemicals and Fertiliser Minister M.K. Alagiri who have not been devoting enough time, and insiders say that work is seriously lagging behind in their respective ministries.

The wait will be on till end-December to see how they have fared.

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Time flies with Rajya Sabha clocks

The expression time flies took on a whole new meaning in the Rajya Sabha in the week just past. A few minutes into zero hour that starts at noon, MPs pointed out that at least three of the wall-mounted clocks in the chamber were racing ahead.

All of them were whirring away at their own speed as if they had a mind of their own. Within an hour, they had gained a staggering 10 hours and 45 minutes. And in the next 15 minutes, they had gained another four and a half hours.

Deputy Chairman K. Rahman Khan, who was presiding, was unfazed. "There's nothing that can be done about it. It's controlled by the central system. And don't worry I am going by this clock in front of me," he said, pointing to the timepiece on his podium.

Normalcy returned the next day.

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Where is Akash Darshan temple?

The capital's Akshardham temple across the Yamuna river is known. But where on earth is the Akash Darshan temple? To go by Sports Minister M.S. Gill, it's located at the very same spot as the Akshardham temple!

Twice while responding to a calling attention motion in the Rajya Sabha, he referred to the temple area where the 2010 Commonwealth Games village will come up as the Akash Darshan temple. The first time could have been attributed to a slip of tongue. But when it happened a second time, many were seen looking at one another in bewilderment.

Perhaps, given the enormous burden that Gill shoulders to ensure that stadia and other infrastructure for the Games are ready on time, many forgave him for the slip of the tongue.

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Agni-II test's Mahabharata connection

In the epic Mahabharata, no battle would take place after sunset. And this has set some in the army wondering if that is the reason why the first night test of the nuclear-capable intermediate range Agni-II missile ended in failure.

"Apparently our scientists believe in the Mahabharata where no fight used to take place after sunset," said an army official.

Agni-II, the surface-to-surface missile has been the country's ambitious project under its Integrated Guided Missile Development Programme. Its first trial after sunset this month ended in failure. This is the second test failure for the ballistic missile.

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Pranabda losing his cool

Is there any particular reason why the usually seasoned and composed Finance Minister Pranab Mukherjee is losing his temper these days? Many are beginning to wonder if it is because of work pressure or because of his inability to tackle burning issues like price rise.

An admirer of Indian political philosopher Kautilya, Mukherjee lost his cool twice in the past week. On the first occasion he reacted angrily to scribes who were keen to know the outcome of a meeting of the Group of Ministers on the third generation (3G) spectrum allocation issue. "Why should I tell the media?" he burst out.

Then again on the anniversary of the 26/11 terror strikes, an irascible finance minister got into an argument with the Bharatiya Janata Party's Ananth Kumar on the issue of compensation to victims of the attacks.

"I have come only to listen to him (L.K. Advani). Not to hear from you," he exploded in parliament. One hears that he is snowed under with work in the ministry and hardly finds time to socialise or play troubleshooter, which is his forte.

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Putting Kashmir experience to good use

Union Health Minister Ghulam Nabi Azad's stint as Jammu and Kashmir chief minister has stood him in good stead and he is trying to replicate several such practices in his present role.

In Srinagar, he often conducted surprise checks in hospitals and found that most of the patients were from the interiors of the state, having travelled huge distances to avail themselves of better facilities. With a view to easing their burden he immediately set up district hospitals and that improved matters.

In the capital too he has found the same thing being played out. Many of the patients arriving in huge numbers at the premier All India Institute of Medical Sciences (AIIMS) are also from the country's outback.

His grand proposal to set up eight more such institutes across the country is bound to ease the overcrowding at the referral institute. But just how fast it will get off the ground is what everybody is keenly awaiting.

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'Stage-managed' minority affairs

The entire nation got to know about the tiff between the Samajwadi Party's (SP) Amar Singh and Bharatiya Janata Party's (BJP) S.S. Ahluwalia in the Rajya Sabha over raising 'Jai Shri Ram' slogans. But was there more to it than meets the eye?

Amar Singh rushed towards the BJP member and pushed him. Following this, Ahluwalia, a Sikh, was heard asking the SP leader why he was targeting a member of one minority community to protect another.

Amar Singh, who later apologised for his behaviour, said he was against any religious slogans being raised in the house.

Some MPs, including the Nationalist Congress Party leader Tariq Anwar, however, felt the episode was "stage-managed" and the two leaders actually wanted to send a message to their constituencies.

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Like Congress like BJP

Castigating the Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) for its role in the demolition of the Babri mosque following the Liberhan Commission report, Congress spokesman Abhishek Manu Singhvi landed himself in a spot of bother.

He said while the BJP had rewarded its leaders such as L.K. Advani and Murli Manohar Joshi with ministerial berths, the Congress had denied such favours to Sajjan Kumar and Jagdish Tytler, accused in the 1984 anti-Sikh riots.

However, Singhvi's remarks drew a sharp retort from mediapersons who reminded the spokesperson that the two leaders were denied the Lok Sabha ticket only after the famous shoe-hurling episode. And when it was further pointed out that Tytler had been suitably rehabilitated as office-bearer in-charge of Bihar, an embarrassed Singhvi quickly shifted topic.

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No bills please

External Affairs Minister S.M. Krishna and his deputy Shashi Tharoor had come under fire for staying in five-star hotels, though both emphasised that the expenses were borne by them and not by the ministry. Sure enough, that did not satisfy many.

The right to information cell of the ministry is now flooded with detailed queries on the breakup of their stay in the luxury hotels - the bill for food, laundry and non-alcoholic beverages. However, the ministry has said it cannot provide any information as it never picked up the bill!

--IANS